4.4.6 The Role Of Excitement

In growing from childhood to adulthood, meeting all the challenges of life including the inevitable changes that we encounter, we need a constant flow of energy that is renewed over and over again.

I described, earlier in this Chapter, how this renewal of energy happens physically; (food and drink) and spiritually; (love, nurture, inspiration etc.).

I believe that excitement is also an important source of energy and I will describe some aspects of excitement now.

Natural growth and development explains the curiosity of childhood and youth and this follows on into adulthood albeit at a more measured pace.  In adulthood, the purpose of many of our life’s pursuits is to provide us with a level of excitement above the norm of our day-to-day life.

This need for excitement explains why (depending on our interests) we seek enjoyment in different activities such as sport, music, films, documentaries, art, crafts, food, sex, reading, the great outdoors, diverse forms of entertainment, (including things we are afraid of such as murder, crime etc.), hobbies, interests, amusements, all types of leisure, and if we are fortunate – our work!

I think that it is fair to say that, as adults, the needier we are – emotionally – the more difficult we find having healthy boundaries in respect of what excites us.  Rather than healthy life-affirming excitement we yearn for instant gratification – seeking it out like immature children.

Consider why violence and sex are so popular in entertainment.  They both give an instant hit of excitement.  And what are the main items on the news every day everywhere in the world?

Over the life cycle, excitement, particularly in the realm of discovery of new things, is closely linked to growth.  Some decades ago it was considered that all formal education took place in youth.  However the focus on life-long learning challenges this notion, and the joy and excitement of education/learning, both informal and formal, is now available to all ages [1].  This, I believe, has been a very positive cultural change in Ireland in my lifetime.

Excitement is, in turn, closely linked to creativity, which is vital for our happiness and contentment in life.  Freedom, fun, expansiveness, adventure, generosity of spirit, and outward looking attitude all enhance creativity, and creativity in turn enables and encourages further freedom, fun etc. in a positive feedback loop. And creativity is welcome in any part of our lives but is of vital importance in times of crisis.

Excitement is therefore of great importance in our discussion on supporting families affected by imprisonment. 

If we are growing up in a family in the Focus Group, the joy of learning, (the fount, and sometimes origin of excitement and creativity for the vast majority of the population mentioned above) might often be thought to be okay for others but too far removed from the reality of our lives to even aspire to. [2]

The likelihood is that excitement is linked to addictive behaviours, or crisis-that-debilitates rather than creativity-that-nurtures.

I propose that this belief becomes internalised in early childhood and is reinforced over and over again to the extent that ultimately an unconscious core belief develops that in order to find excitement we need to be either waiting for the next external fix, or be in a state of crisis, or a state of high alertness waiting for crisis – a kind of between crisis hiatus. 

[1]. I saw a little item on telly one night about a man aged 92 doing a Course in University.  I could sense the energy he was getting from the excited way he spoke about what he was learning.

[2]. I am sure that if you work in this area you will have met parents whose ambition was that their children are not addicted, or not involved in criminality and subsequent imprisonment, rather than having the ambition that their children might get so many hundred points and go to college.

What about excitement, adventure and creativity in organisations? How does an organisation keep the energy of staff at an optimum level?

I have observed throughout my working life that many organisations, rather than fostering and encouraging creativity, actually put many processes in place that, inadvertently, suppress it.

Now this is a bit of an energy downer.

Suppressing creativity and a sense of adventure will always drain energy, whereas allowing them will increase it.

Some organisations do wonderful, creative work with children and young people in the Focus Group but their policies and procedures are predicated more on fear of getting it wrong, (i.e. no-risk) rather than trust that if it goes wrong we will learn from it. 

This fear is not only concerned with protecting vulnerable children from staff that are untrained or not vetted properly, (where caution is understandable and proper), but also quite mundane, day-to-day matters.  I believe that too much caution in the day-to-day running of any organisation reduces the level of passion and inhibits progress.  I liken it to a sea-anchor dragging back a boat.

In the private sector, being too cautious leads to failure and therefore poor return on investment, or low or no profits.  Organisations in the private sector know that risks must be taken because they are viewing their products from the point of view of the consumer – not themselves.

In the public sector some people may take risks if they are creative and want to make a difference. But, as I said when I was describing the Pillars, generally the public service is risk-averse.  I believe that people who chose to work in the community/voluntary sector are looking for excitement – and they should not be disappointed.

Fostering a sense of adventure optimises the inclusion of highly motivated staff who actually want to work in the field and – just as importantly – will remain interested.  In addition, the creativity (mentioned as being essential above) will be enabled, or facilitated, as the work proceeds in the long term.

One thinks once again of the old cliché, an amateur wants to get it right, a professional is afraid of getting it wrong which, has, of course, implications for risk taking and beyond that, excitement. 

Sometimes our ethos and atmosphere may lean, in a general sense, towards blame rather than responsibility (or compassion).

There is no better way of ensuring that everything becomes boring, dead and dull than fostering a culture of blame.

Naturally, if I feel that I am going to be blamed when something goes wrong I won’t be inclined to take a risk.  And anyway, a blame culture does not mirror the ethos that we want to prevail among the families and children/young people.

Blame can lead to (sometimes unconsciously), families experiencing incongruence (because we are not doing what we claim we do), rather than the far more desirable, from the therapeutic point of view, congruence.

Almost always, in a job advertisement, in addition to the job description, there is something that reflects well on the organisation to make it attractive to the prospective employee.

Most people are excited when having applied for a new job they are successful in getting it.  During the application process they learn what is expected of them when they take up the post.

On joining the job, however, reality often sets in fairly quickly.

It is very sad that people, having joined an organisation so that they can make a difference, find their enthusiasm and idealism stunted.  I have met many of them through my years of employment.

While it is often very challenging for organisations to sustain the conditions that foster excitement and creativity I believe that it is worth doing, so that when the hard inflexible rules meet the soft yielding human common ground can be found so that both healthy rules and humanity can flourish together.

I feel extremely lucky that my first experience in helping people was doing streetwork in Southill in Limerick.

To listen to the uncensored views of young people who were angry and disaffected was a huge part of my education as a community worker and it was indeed a rare privilege.  Streetwork truly meets people where they are at, and not where I, as a practitioner would like them to be.  I was delighted that I didn’t know much about the young people and their families.  I actually believe that this made it more exciting for me and my fellow workers.

On that subject, I think that prior information (from referrals, assessments and suchlike, and nowadays even Google) diminishes the joy of discovery and reduces the level of excitement so necessary for motivation. I also think that too much of it inhibits creativity whereas none at all has the opposite effect, that is, it opens the door to be creative.

There is nothing wrong, of course, with discussing someone’s circumstances, situation etc. with a fellow practitioner prior to meeting them. However I believe that such discussions should take place in an atmosphere of good-will that focuses on an individual’s positive attributes.

And, just a little addendum here…..

It may be argued that proactive encouragement of creativity and excitement among staff in an agency that works with children and families is not that important as long as the children/young people who are availing of the service offered by the agency experience it.

But I believe it is.  I invite you to consider the discussions in previous Chapters on systems theory, and symmetry/resonance here.

I have never been to prison – not yet anyway – nor have I ever worked as a prison officer.

But having met many members of families in the Focus Group who have been to prison I believe that one of the most challenging aspects of imprisonment is boredom.

As I stated above there is a basic human need for excitement.  This is why being locked up for many hours a day, with short times for exercise (and particularly solitary confinement) is such a difficult thing, and is potentially so damaging, for the human being.

In the Chapter on Anthropology I proposed that one of the reasons why living in towns and cities is attractive to us despite all their downsides is that we constantly meet different people.  One of the most important sources of our excitement is other people, i.e. relationship – so it is truly punishing for society to deny someone contact with others.

Another important source of excitement in our lives is meaning. As an exercise, it might be good to write down everything that has meaning for you. 

Try it now!

Perhaps you find meaning in the relationships that you have with members of the family you were born into (your grandparents, parents and siblings). If you have a partner/spouse and children they will undoubtedly have meaning for you. If you do not have children, you may find meaning in nieces, nephews or children of friends.  What about your own friends? There are also things that have meaning like hobbies and interests.  Some films, books etc. might have more meaning for you than others. Why is this? Do sport, politics, religion, current affairs have meaning, or the goings on of celebrities? Not to mention your education or your work. (I could go on and on here).

All the above are experiences that can excite – they might induce positive feelings or negative feelings. Usually, if we choose them consciously they are positive. As a general rule, I will state that if our life has meaning, it usually means that we have good enough excitement.

Imagine now if a substantial number of the above experiences were denied you? How would you feel? What would you get excitement from? If you have been to prison you might be able to throw some light on this question.

Negative events in our lives can have meaning, but it can be difficult for any of us to find meaning in them.  (That doesn’t mean that the negative event hasn’t meaning – it’s just not that easy to find it)!

So it is very difficult for people who are in prison to find meaning in their incarceration, and then, when in prison, to find things that have meaning for them.  I have met men and women who did – but it requires a bit of a journey.

The journey to our truth can be a difficult one – and it needs time, space and support. 

Lack of meaning can cause us to feel empty – which can be very debilitating, and often leads to having little hope. This, in turn, poses substantial challenges for all who work in the prison or imprisonment environment.

But despite the problems and difficulties, there are also great opportunities, which is why I revisit the topic later in the website, here and again here.