I will finish this Sub-Chapter on Leadership and Processing Speed with a little story to stimulate a bit of thought about this travelling alone-travelling together theme.
One morning, many, many years ago, long before newsfeeds, social media, instant communication and the like, I opened the local paper and I read about a man whom I had known some years previously. He had spent time in prison for violent crimes that hurt many people. For many years he was homeless, and his crimes arose from his desperate need to feed his drug addiction and continue his street drinking.
My memory of previous reports about him, written by reporters in court, had been very disparaging, referring to him in very insulting language. But that morning the article about him was glowing in the extreme.
He was described as a hero, and a man of outstanding bravery. I read how he had displayed amazing speed of thought when he intervened in a potentially tragic situation and saved someone’s life.
When the emergency services (including the Gardaí, who – obviously – knew him well) arrived, he was praised for his quick-thinking and his courage.
Sadly, the courage that he displayed in those few moments did not act as a spark to change his life for the better and he is now no longer with us, his body having yielded to drugs.
After I read the article I pondered (not for the first time) on different forms of courage. Because it takes one kind of courage to do what he did – and it takes another kind of courage to give up drink and drugs.
What is common to both, is, however, fear of the unknown.
Very often, when we choose to act (because it is a choice) in a high-risk situation we do it so quickly that our assessment of what to do, and indeed what might happen if it all goes wrong needs to be done so quickly that if we consulted with others and/or sought their support it would be too late and the moment would have passed.
We know, intuitively and instinctively – what will work and our brief assessment tells us that it has to be done as fast as possible. So we do it alone and, actually, if we thought too much about it we mightn’t do it at all.
This is an example (albeit extreme) when it is necessary and appropriate to move fast and travel alone.
Whereas when we give up drugs we do get the chance to think – and when we think what we’d have to lose (our crutch – our means of survival, our emotional life-line, our best friend) the fear is so great that we need support and relationship to travel together – because this will be a much longer journey!