How many times will we say as parents, teachers or youth workers ‘I’d love to know what’s going on in his mind’, when we are worrying about a child or teenager?
I will use this simple and very commonly uttered sentence to describe the relevance of the complex variable in our work.
If only I, the helper, knew what was going on in the distressed person’s mind I’d be able to intervene and fix whatever was wrong.
But I don’t – and even if he tells me, I may always doubt the congruence, accuracy or truth of his description, and if I am self-aware I know that what he shares with me is filtered through my own experience or experiences.
So I have to live, at all times, with a substantial amount of uncertainty.
Because you see, no matter how mysterious the goings-on within a space shuttle, a laptop, a jet plane, or a hydroelectric dam are to the layman, they have all been built by humans, and humans with the required knowledge, working manuals, skills and tools will know what is going on in them, and will be able to repair anything that malfunctions, by simply (well – maybe not that simply – but you know what I mean) following the logical steps described by the manufacturer.
And while an engineer will sometimes make very good use of intuition to effect positive change in the way an engine works, the engine will never withhold information about itself, either unknowingly or intentionally.
Nor will a machine try to influence the future, distort the past, or even, upon consideration, reveal something about itself next week that it did not feel like revealing this week.
(Just as an aside, the more adventurous of us scientists are open to the argument that because of some mysterious and as yet not understood human-machine connection, an engineer may effect positive change in a seemingly inanimate system by being interested in or passionate about it. I think that I have experienced this myself — but I’m not sure)!
Getting back to humans, the physician that takes on the responsibility for fixing a physical condition, (a broken finger, a burst appendix etc.) can be sure beyond any reasonable doubt as to what is going on inside the body. And the entire world of psychiatry has, for decades, been based on the expert (a psychiatrist) trying to find out what is going on inside a patient’s brain.
However a helper that takes on responsibility for emotional healing can never be sure what is going on inside the mind!
If the ability, intention or willingness to withhold knowledge, (or even to unconsciously possess knowledge that has yet to emerge into the conscious mind) points to a higher level of complexity, then the ability to change one’s mind (and thereafter one’s behaviour) from day to day or week to week indicates a high level of variability.
And in addition to not being aware of knowledge that one possesses, there may be awareness of the knowledge but non-awareness of the reasons for the decision to withhold the knowledge.
And added to the already complex situation just described is the fact that the mood or attitude of the helper will undoubtedly produce substantially different results.
That is, those of us who enjoy our work, and offer hope, inspiration, warmth, trust and love will most probably have more positive outcomes than those who are clinical, detached, or uninvolved – I believe anyway.