The next Chapter (on Modalities) will be of interest in choosing the therapeutic elements that will optimise healing of very hurt people that I have been describing in the last number of posts.
Within the chosen modality, three therapeutic elements are identified:
1. Building a therapeutic alliance within the framework of a trusting relationship.
2. Introducing, reinforcing and affirming beliefs about self-efficacy and positive relationships with peers and the world in general.
3. Training in social interaction skills – much of this will be implicit rather than explicit.
An interesting aspect that emerges in research is the benefits of two or more therapists, or support workers, collaborating in the healing.
The thinking here is that sometimes the intensity of the relationship with one therapist is almost too much, and the opportunity to sound-off or get a different perspective can be very helpful.
From my observations over many years I have personally witnessed the power of non-formal encounters where people feel safe, but in a different way to the formal situation. I have found it very interesting that safety is experienced in both situations – i.e. both are equally helpful – and one without the other would not be as effective.
I believe that the non-formal contact allows the person looking for help become confident in growing, i.e. to play with root foundations such as emergence, identity, relationship etc. to see how they fit, at a pace that suits them, just like a child growing up in a good enough family.
But, it is very important to state that when I say non-formal I don’t mean random.
The non-formality needs to have consistency and dependability – once again, like it would have in a family. Consistency mirrors the secure attachment that we are aiming for.
Inconsistency in parenting or unreliability of presence of the parent or the secure base is one of the harmful aspects of avoidant or disorganised styles of attachment and we must take care not to repeat it.