There are a number of aspects of identity that I feel are worth mentioning. For example:
1. Think of all the songs that there are about homecoming, our home place, nostalgia for our imagined perfect past. These are often inspired by a need for identity.
2. I believe that if we are secure in our identity we won’t fear modifying our culture in relationship to accommodate difference. This happens all the time in our lives in different ways.
3. Our obsession with religion, tribalism, nationalism, us and them is connected to our identity. In forming an identity, symbols (flags, mottos, statues, nicknames, anthems, language, music, clothes, badges, uniforms etc.) are important. If we are secure in our identity our relationships with all the above will be in an ‘at ease, natural’ kind of way. If not our relationship with them may be far more intense as the symbols, rather than some inner felt sense of secure identity, define who we actually are. (Which is why, for example, deeply insecure totalitarian regimes are obsessed with frequent and over-the-top displays of symbols).
4. And following on from 3, insecure identity has been exploited by despots and amoral war-mongers to stir up populations against an enemy who is deemed to be defined by evil deeds, i.e. portrayed as having an evil identity, a danger to us.
5. Sport is, of course, generally seen as a healthy way of expressing our identity and being proud of whom we are, whether it is club, county, province, or country. Sporting identity can also be, of course, harmful and extreme, or a vehicle to display hatred towards the other side.
6. Some angst, sadness and often distress that adopted and fostered children feel may be to do with confusion (mostly unconscious) around identity. Adoptive and foster parents have a very special and unique role in affording a child extra space-time to work through the emotions that may arise around identity. Such parents need courage, patience and support in their honouring of this.
7. I believe that the fear of the stranger that is common in humanity and that is manifest in racism probably arises from insecure identity, where someone fears that his identity (or how he defines himself) will be threatened by a strange and/or unknown culture that is unfamiliar. I believe that someone with secure identity will be less fearful of the stranger.
I once heard (or read) the expression ‘identity is a coat we can’t take off’. I can’t remember where I heard it (or read it) but I liked it!